Men
Are Just Happier People --
What
do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your
last name stays put.
The
garage is all yours.
Wedding
plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate
is just another snack...
You
can never be pregnant.
You
can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You
can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car
mechanics tell you the truth.
The
world is your urinal.
You
never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is
just too icky.
You
don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Wrinkles
add character.
Wedding
dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
People
never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New
shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One
mood all the time.
Phone
conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You
know stuff about tanks.
A
five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You
can open all your own jars.
If
someone forgets to invite you, He
or she can still be your friend.
Your
underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three
pairs of shoes are more than enough.
Everything
on your face stays its original color.
The
same hairstyle lasts for years, even decades.
You
only have to shave your face and neck.
You
can play with toys all your life.
One
wallet and one pair of shoes --
one color for all seasons.
You
can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You
can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You
have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You
can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives On December 24 in 25 minutes.
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