While speaking to a good friend about prayer and how difficult it is we tackled the topic of BLOCKS in a forthright way. He made a statement that I found to be insightful and meaningful. Maybe you will find it helpful as well. He said:
The older I get the more I am attracted to meditation rather than a quiet time.
I responded that in the early days of my spiritual awakening I had heard many a sermon, talk and exhortation on the importance of a daily quiet time. In many cases, these same preachers insisted that the "Quiet Times" had to be "Early in the morning". Why? Because Jesus prayed before dawn and we need to be like Jesus.
Those two "SHOULDS hurt my ability to pray more than almost anything else I learned. Up til I heard those teachings I was free to pray, sing, read, think and meditate on God and His goodness as much as I wanted and any time I wanted. Now I discovered that I was doing it all wrong.
I hated early morning prayers because I often fell asleep when I was quiet. Second, I almost never had a "Quiet Time" I usually had a "Noisy Time" singing, talking to myself, praising God and enjoying God. My teachers were a serious lot and thought my approach was off base and way to much fun. I had no long lists of people and things I was praying about. I was not weeping over my sins and the sins of others. I was way too happy.
These things were big problems. What was I do to do? I soldiered on and my times with God became less and less so I had to fake it. I knew I should do better but I found it almost impossible to pray.
What would you suggest to such a hypocrite as I?
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