Digital Communication

As a relationship counselor who builds myself as "Building a lifetime of great relationships" I am concerned about what current technology is doing to our human and spiritual relationship habits. Wit so much tweeting, texting and face booking going on people are expressing their little hearts out but who is listening and responding? To whom can we go for a "heart-to-heart talk" now days? There are many people reading this and more or not reading and just ignoring so what does all this digital interaction portend for the future? Maybe the Japanese, who have been doing the digital dances longer than we Americans, have a clue to the future. Take a look at this Wall Street Journal article.

I find it fascinating that these young Japanese men have no personal relationships with a real woman. Is it because their social skills are so weak that they cannot hold a conversation" Maybe their are so scared of the opposite sex that they simply hide in the caves of their computer screens and live off the fantasy of speaking to and listening to a cartoon character.

I have noted over the years how rare it is for people to hold a conversation that stays on an important topic for more than one or two interchanges. If a friend tries to share something that is bothering or concerning him/her and tells someone, that listener will change the subject after no more than two interactions. I suppose these cartoon women in Japan will stay on topic for longer than that.

One trend that may help young texters, however, is gaming. When I broached this topic with a fifteen year old recently he said, "We don't text all the time. We actually talk on the phone a lot because we have to cooperate with each other to beat the other team. That was news to me and it was good news. My grand kids may not be as digitized as I feared. I would never have guessed it was because of computer games.

Still, these young men in Japan are cause for concern, I think. Computer and video sex can be powerful inducements for withdrawal from life and an introduction to addiction. I am convinced that teaching adults and student good social skills is essential to the future health of our families, churches and society. Churches with small groups can be a great antidote for impersonal relationships.