I am amazed at how little the church and all its leadership training in Bible schools, seminaries, CEU courses, etc focus on healthy relationships. Proverbs clearly states that "Death and Life are in the Tongue and those who love the Tongue will eat the fruit of either death or life."
No profession, calling, work or field loves the tongue more than the ministry. Most people think the ministry is all talking and no acting, listening or silent influencing. That is what they see and hear.
Most people are urged to enter the ministry of preaching if they can speak well. I was urged to go into the ministry because I was an extrovert with a lot to say. I was a very angry, bitter young man but I was strongly recruited to "Be a Preacher". The ability to talk was the key. They assumed I could be taught what to say but nobody seemed to care that I was an expert at attacking but not very good at warm caring.
It was when I was in graduate school for Counselors that the Proverb about Death and Life hit me and convicted me that I was a death dealer not a life giver. Jesus said, "Blessed are the peacemakers..." but I was a fight maker and was rewarded for my ability to fight. It has been a long,hard battle for me but I am better than I was. However, I still like to fantasize about wiping some smart aleck out!
I do not remember hearing a sermon on peace but a lot of them on fighting for the faith.
The fruit of the Spirit as listed in Galatians is all about peace, patience, love and caring. Why are those so rarely used as ways to judge whether a Christian is mature?
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